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What are some funny school jokes?Question: What do you use when you have to use the toilet whiletaking a test? Answer: A 2 pencil. TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America. MARIA: Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS: Maria! TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank? FRANK: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? FRANK: The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.” TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on thefloor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using cheap adidas tables! TEACHER: Glenn, how cheap jordans online do you spell “crocodile?” GLENN: K R O K O D A I L” TEACHER: No, that’s wrong GLENN: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O!! TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O! TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! TEACHER: Goss, why do you always get so dirty? GOSS: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are. TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with “I.” MILLIE: I is. TEACHER: No, Millie. Always say, “I am.” MILLIE: All right. “I am cheap nike shoes the ninth letter of the alphabet.” TEACHER: Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE? TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, sametime.” TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’scherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do cheap Air max shoes you know why hisfather didn’t punish him?” LOUIS: Because cheap jordan sneakers George still had the Cheap jordans axe in his hand. TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers beforeeating? SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook. TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his? CLYDE: No, teacher, it’s the same dog!; TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talkingwhen people are no longer interested? HAROLD: A teacher. Teacher: Well, there is one good thing I can tell you about yourson. Father: Oh? What’s that? Teacher: With the grades that he’s getting, he can’t possibly becheating. Teacher: Do you understand the importance of punctuation? Student: Oh yes, I always get to school on time. Teacher: cheap jordans free shipping Can you tell me what a unit of electricity is called? Student: What? Teacher: Correct Teacher: Please name two pronouns. Student: Who? Me? Teacher: Correct. Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stoppedhim, what virtue would I be showing? Student: Brotherly love. Teacher: What is the difference between a car and a tree? Student: The car leaves the shed whereas the tree sheds the leaf Teacher: “Sam, you talk a lot!” Sam: “It’s a family tradition”. Teacher: “What do you mean?” Sam: “Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher”. Teacher: “What about your mother?” Sam: She is a woman. Tom: “How should I convey the news to my father that I’ve failed?” David: “You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year’sperformance repeated”. Teacher: You failure! At your age Bill Gates stood first in theclass. Student: Mind you, Sir, but at your age, Hitler committed suicide. A Teacher lecturing on population: “About every 10 seconds a womangives birth to a kid.” A Man stands up: “We must find and stop her!.” Teacher: “I killed a person,” convert this sentence into futuretense. Johnny: The future tense is “You will go to jail”. Teacher: Raju, How many times have I told you not to scribble onthe board? Raju: Sorry Miss, I did not count.
How do you tell funny jokes?1. it’s all about delivering the punch line. 2. if no one gets it then be quiet and wait for it giving them time to laugh almost always works, while trying to explain the joke after saying it, kills it. 3. if you think the person might not get what you’re saying, explain the terms you’re gonna use briefly but without ruining the joke! 4. don’t laugh before, during or after you say the joke, it over builds the suspence of the joke, so people expecting an impossibly incredible joke, will only hear a good one. 5. practice it on you’re own or with someone who’s opinion you don’t care much about. if they laugh that’s a confidence boost, if they don’t then at least you know what you did wrong.
What are some funny clean jokes?Two muffins are baking in a tin. One turns to the other and says “Is it hot in here or jut me, the other replies “Ahhh A talking muffin” Neutron and a proton order a drink at a bar. Updated Those are truely pathetic jokes. here goes: There was a chicken who walked in to a library. The librarian asked him what he wanted. The chicken clucked; “book book book book book”, so the librarian gave it a book and the chicken took it away. About an hour later, the chcken came back. The chicken clucked; “book book book book book” to the librarian again. She gave him another book and the chicken waddled cheap yeezys away with it. Another hour later the chicken came back. The chicken clucked; “book book book book book”. The librarian wanted to know what the chicken was doing with all these books, so she gave it another book then followed it. The chicken cheap jordans shoes waddled along to a nearby pond. The pond was surrounded with books and a frog sat on a lilypad in the middle. The chicken went over to the frog. The chicken clucked; “book book book book book”. The frog only replied with “readit, readit, readit”. The librarian then knew why the chicken kept coming back for more books.
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What are funny chemistry jokes?I’d make a chemistry joke here, but all the good ones argon. Q: Why do are helium, curium and barium called the medical elements? A: Because if you can’t helium or curium, you barium! Two chemists visit a restaurant. The first chemist says, “I’ll have H 2 O.” The second chemist says, “I’ll have an H 2 O too.”. and he died (of hydrogen peroxide poisoning). One liners: Copper went and insulted Argon. Argon had no reaction. Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.
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